Fast forward to 2017 and it seems that I have completely forgotten what I worked hard for back in 2011. Wait! Let me explain.
Back in 2011 and after the show, among everybody else in my batch, it seemed like I was the only one who never moved on. I was very confident of my novelty in that show that it would bring me somewhere and it did… for a while.
It brought me notoriety. It gave me free access and privileges no ordinary person would get; it gave me cutting-line powers and I loved every minute of it. I wouldn’t openly call myself a “celebrity” but, boy, did it feel that way. After the show, I was already rubbing elbows with certain people and hanging out with what I felt was the “right” crowd and it felt that all I needed was to land myself on a steady acting gig and I’m already there.
2013 came and my #roadtosub300 started. I partnered with a handful of amazing brands who believed in my mantra and I was all set. Then something happened. Pride partnered with Arrogance became my constant companions from 2014 all the way to 2016. 2014, I discovered the dirty truth of the entertainment industry and quit. Even after that realization, I was still proud and arrogant until I caught myself not liking who I have become. 2015 I decided to retreat to my comfort zone and got myself employed in a BPO company just a few minutes away from where I live. I wanted to get away from it all and just bring myself back to reality.
Who knew that getting myself back to reality meant gaining back all of my weight with some spare change? All the athleticism I gained doing CrossFit is now reduced to barely doing one kneeling push up. 2015 and 2016 is a combination of happy and sad emotions and with those emotions, you pair it with an amazing eating binge. I knew I was bringing myself back to that dark place but then I thought to myself, “would you rather be happy, proud, and arrogant or would you rather be depressed and overweight?”. The truth is, I don’t want to be either. I want to be happy and it does not matter where it is. All I am sure is that I don’t want to be where I am right now.
There. I said it. I am unhappy with myself but at least I am not proud and arrogant. So I think it’s high time I get myself healthier again and be genuinely happy again… with only God and no one else.
Let’s do this, Eboy. For the Nth time, I know. Slow, steady, and consistent this time.